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(no subject) [Aug. 12th, 2008|04:38 am]
I'm going to see The Fratellis in September with the sister, Jessica and Damian. We will once more venture south to the wonders of Dallas, where there is actually some semblance of a music scene. I am much, much excited.

I quit the horrors of Murphy USA, but seeing how I am still unemployed and currently without residence, I am questioning the intelligence of this act. However, staying there any longer would have forced me to either commit murder, arson, or some combination of the two, ultimately resulting in a long prison sentence, and most future employers frown upon that sort of thing.

Then again, you have a place to sleep and food to eat in prison.

Oh well.

I'm terrified of my lack of a future. I have no ambition. I lost that drive to kill and conquer a long time ago, and I have no idea how to get it back. It's almost as if nothing challenges me anymore, but that's not right, either. That implies that I have done all I ever wanted, and the world is empty due to my lustful pillaging technique. Not so. Not even a little bit so. I just...have nothing to fight for. I don't *want*.

I have needs. Everyone has needs. But I have no passion.

I'm a fucking 24-year old burn out.

Wah wah wah.

Pardon me, I have to go find a man playing the world's saddest song on its tiniest violin. :P
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once upon a time ago [May. 12th, 2008|04:52 am]
all of this used to matter.

Now I'm just drunk and alone.

Happy Mother's Day.
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country boys are only after sex and noise :D [Oct. 30th, 2007|05:41 am]
[Current Mood |cheerfulcheerful]
[Current Music |The Fratellis - Cuntry Boys and City Girls]

I swear to God, they use songs by the Fratellis to promote the most absurd, random and inappropriate shit.

Chelsea Dagger is not a song intended to promote a kid's movie, people.

However, it is awesome, and makes me smile.

I fucking love the Fratellis.
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(no subject) [Oct. 21st, 2007|07:39 am]
I just wanna dance with you.
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sleeping at night [Jul. 28th, 2007|06:04 am]
[Current Mood |rushedrushed]

I know other people do it, easily, in fact, but I cannot seem to get the hang of sleeping at night. Night time seems to be so full of other things that need to be done--dishes to be washed, apartments to be cleaned, friends to be seen, work to be done. To sleep at night seems wasteful. Like I'm throwing away the best part of the day.

However, during the day, I am a narcoleptic. The sunlight makes my eyes so tired, and it's hot and I sweat and...daytime is no. Everyone else is awake during the day, so it's crowded and loud and busy. I am a hermit. I sit alone in my apartment and watch TV, not because there's something wrong with me, but because I like it. I like it when my apartment is quiet and I can watch whatever I want, naked, and no one says anything. When I do this during the day, people think that I'm odd. But at night, it's okay.

At night, I can feel normal.

Sometimes it's like living in a completely different world.

I kind of like it.

I was just going through a bunch of stuff online, trying to find something to read, and I realized that I haven't posted here in a long time. And, apparently I have had a livejournal since September of 2001, which is just trippy as fuck.

We were so young once.

Now I feel old, and tired, and cranky. I have to be at work at 4, I need to finish doing the dishes, I want to take a bath, but here comes the sun, and soon it will be too late to do anything but sleep. Sleep until it's time to work. I feel like I work to live and live to work.

Maybe I can squeeze in a bath after all. :P
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and snorting some coke off her thighs [May. 8th, 2007|07:08 pm]
I want to drink. A lot. I have to work tomorrow, and I wasn't supposed to, and I have no idea why I answer the phone on my days off...and I might have failed my final for Religion and Violence?

Why won't anyone drink with me? I don't have my last final until Thursday! SOMEONE LOVE ME
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Sleeps all day and he dreams of you! [May. 4th, 2007|02:08 am]
[Current Mood |chipperchipper]
[Current Music |The Fratellis - Baby Fratelli]

I'm writing this on my new laptop! Yay!

I really should be sleeping. Or studying, as finals are coming up. But I just can't bring myself to care anymore. For the love of God--my final thought project for Study of Religion was peppered with weird shark facts. It had nothing to do with sharks. I might fail.

And yet...

I'm not even watching Chinese soap operas!

I'm just...online. Enjoying being on my computer. Looking at all the porn I want! Catching up on all my fun celebrity gossip facts! Did you know Jared Leto has gout? Jonathan Rhys Meyers went into rehab? Well, I didn't. But I do now, so life is good.

Let's see. I have two finals on Monday, one on Tuesday, and one on Thursday. My mom is coming on Friday to get little sister, so after that I shall be living alone until August. Wendy is going to Ohio. The rest of my friends are unreliable. I shall be spending a lot of time with this laptop. It will be my saving grace. Well, this, and watching the entire series of Buffy, Angel, VMars and possibly Roswell. Oh! And the first season of Bones, because I bought it for $18. Yep. My life is sad. Without TV, I'd probably go insane. Who knows? Maybe I'll do something productive over the summer, like study for the GREs or join a gym.



Yeah. I'm going to watch so much TV.

And drink myself into cirrhosis, bitches! Hell's yeah.
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I still <3 Mike He the most [Apr. 22nd, 2007|02:00 am]
I spend most of my free time studying, crying, or watching Chinese soap operas. Mostly studying as of late, as every religious studies professor is a procrastinator at heart, thus all of our major assignments/tests have been within the last two weeks. I still kind of want to kill myself, but it's slowly passing. Finals are coming! YAY.

But yeah. I love Chinese soap operas now? And I am obsessed with the three hot asian guys that exist in Taiwan, because as much as I love Chinese soap operas, I can't watch them if there isn't a hot guy. I'm extremely shallow like that. Oh well.

But yeah. I'm alive.
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(no subject) [Feb. 23rd, 2007|01:55 am]
[Current Music |The Fratellis - Henrietta]

So, watching Grey's Anatomy apparently makes me think.

Who is my "person"? The one person that I have to tell to make something real? The only person I actually *want* to tell things?

Meh. I had a whole existential crisis planned out to discuss, but fuck it.

Everyone listen to The Fratellis and dance! I demand it.
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I HATE OLD PEOPLE [Feb. 20th, 2007|01:42 pm]
[Current Location |DHT computer lab]
[Current Mood |crankycranky]

The new woman at work sickens me. She's so old she has the old lady smell (death/cat pee) and I worry that if she dies in the kiosk, we won't be able to get rid of it. And, she's ruining my day off. She was supposed to come in on Sunday and work 9-12 so I could train her how to close, but she didn't. She was "too sick."

Well, of fucking course she's too sick! Her organs are dust! She was alive before they invented gasoline operated vehicles! She doesn't know how to use a calculator--it's TOO ADVANCED. She probably doesn't have a watch! She uses a sundial! OH MY FUCKING GOD.


Anyway. I haven't slept since 10:30 yesterday morning. My body is functioning on caffeine and nicotine. I don't smell that great myself, now that I think about it, but I still don't smell like death. Or cat pee. And I won't get to sleep until I get off work tonight at midnight.

I think this is all because I bragged about having a semi-normal work schedule. God is punishing me.



I also feel really skanky because of my crush on my married guy friend. It's getting worse. I need a new object of affection! Maybe a professor? Why couldn't David have hired a hot guy at work? :(

I need a nap.
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